Monday, March 16, 2015

New Yorker Anti-Caption Contest #467


33 comments:

Evan said...

"My desires are... unconventional."

Dex said...

"Well, Obama promised cage."

boneguy said...

That's your third cousin Manny. He was born a stool pigeon but grew up to be a jailbird.

boneguy said...

He's been like that ever since John Cleese nailed him to his perch.

Steve_O said...

"Huge Maya Angelou fan."

Shelly said...

"This is the worst production of 'La Cage' ever."

Anonymous said...

"It's a fucking jailbird."

Dr Sumguy said...

"They had to cage him ... He thinks he's Don Ho ... And keeps singing ... 'Tiny Bubbles'!"

boneguy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
boneguy said...

He showed up shortly after they shut down Guano-tanamo.

Dr Sumguy said...

"We had to cage him ... He kept fleeing the co-op!"

Dr Sumguy said...

"We had to hide his Iphone, and cage him ... His Tweeting was driving us crazy!"

Dr Sumguy said...

"He's the new Bank of Bird-in-Hand's branch manager!"

Dex said...

"He calls it a 'gated community'"

NJ-to-TX said...

"Suicide by wind."

Anonymous said...

"That's right kids, your dad is Pretty Boy Floyd."

JohnnyB said...

She's a go-go dancer. It's a 60s thing.

JohnnyB said...

The doors to your cage shall be decked with gold
And hung on a willow tree

Kathy H said...

OK. This is our first rehearsal for The Producers. We need someone to play Leo Bloom and someone to play Max Bialystock. I'll be the Concierge. And, Benny up there will play one of the Dirty Digusting Pigeons. Let's start...

Concierge: Who d'ya want?
Leo Bloom: I beg your pardon?
Concierge: Who d'ya want? Nobody gets in the building unless I know who they want. I'm the "concierge". My husband used to be the "concierge", but he's dead. Now I'M the "concierge".
Max Bialystock: We are seeking Franz Liebkind.
Concierge: Oh... the Kraut! He's on the top floor, apartment 23.
Max Bialystock: Thank you...
Concierge: ...But you won't find him there... he's up on the roof with his boids. He keeps boids. Dirty... disgusting... filthy... lice-ridden boids. You used to be able to sit out on the stoop like a person. Not anymore! No, sir! Boids!... You get my drift?
Leo Bloom: We... uh... get your "drift". Thank you, madam.
Concierge: I'm not a "madam"! I'm a "concierge"!

End Scene

Anonymous said...

"Tweet, don't tweet grow tweet up tweet to be tweet like tweet Uncle tweet Tim. B'gaw

Anonymous said...

"We're doing a production of La Cage Aux Fowls".

Jim Cavanaugh

Anonymous said...

"Your father's in the sin bin for pooping in his own nest."

Dr Sumguy said...

"He's serving one to three, for flashing his pecker!"

REX said...

"Well…It looks like he was 'set free' by someone who was very passive aggressive."

JohnnyB said...

I know why the caged bird sings but I don't know the song. But if she tweets a few bars, I can wing it.

reid savid said...

"I thought Kafka was only joking."

boneguy said...

Your Dad's agoraphobia has flared up again.

Anonymous said...

"He did unspeakable things to a worm that went viral."

Tim H said...

"His name is Larry. And he's a cager."

boneguy said...

3000 trips down the coal mine later, you get a gold cage and a decent pension.

Anonymous said...

"Look--I know wages are low and rents are sky-high and you have suffocating student debt, but you are huge and the nest is full of shit. Fly."

Anonymous said...

50 Shades of Gray Parrot

Anonymous said...

"...and don't ever even think about sticking my ass in assisted living."

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al in la

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Los Angeles, California, United States
BORN: Brooklyn RAISED: Staten Island WHERE AT NOW: Los Angeles, California WHY: We will one day know.