Sunday, January 25, 2015

New Yorker Anti-Caption Contest #461


52 comments:

Dex said...

"Shut up, Bob."

Jabba said...

"Do you want a window seat?"

Dr Sumguy said...

"Will you be disembarking in Chicago, or will you continue to Kitty Hawk?"

Dr Sumguy said...

"Welcome to 'Whiz-Air' ... Sir ... The're no toilets aboard!"

NJ-to-TX said...

"You know that mother Fokker be glidin' sweet, dude!"

boneguy said...

The arrival time varies between three to four days from now.

boneguy said...

Hot air balloons depart from terminal six.

Dr Sumguy said...

You'll be boarding with group C!"

Shelly said...

"You'll be flying stand-by, sir; standing by a right-front wing strut."

Anonymous said...

"Sir, the plane taking off is Air Al-Qaeda...and tell me he didn't miss the tower again."

Tim H said...

"Here at Spirit Airlines everybody takes a turn in the pilot's seat."

boneguy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

This is the Wright plane for you.

Anonymous said...

I'm not wearing any pants.

JohnnyB said...

Fuselage? You crazy bastard. How are you seeing a fuselage?

Anonymous said...

"Flight 327 departs for Chicago at 9:40, and your fly's open."

NJ-to-TX said...

"We assumed that since you are bisexual that you'd prefer the biplane. But don't try any of your sick stunts up there."

Anonymous said...

Suck my cock, Baldie!

Dr Sumguy said...

First, we'll have you sign the 'Holy Shit' disclaimer!"

Dr Sumguy said...

"In this case, 'Departs', means not all the aircraft leaves at once!"

Dr Sumguy said...

"For an extra $5.75 we can offer you a Charles Lindbergh wicker chair and a box lunch!"

Anonymous said...

"Welcome to EL aLINLA Airline."

Jim Cavanaugh

Anonymous said...

"Your wife departed at 8:23 in the Gate B gift shop. Massive coronary. Non-refundable ticket. Move on. There's people in back of you."

NJ-to-TX said...

"Christ, what's the difference? O'Hare, Midway - It's Chicago! You going, or not?

Anonymous said...

"It's for our Jewish passengers because it's easier to shoot down."

boneguy said...

Feel free to push the flight attendant button all you want.

Anonymous said...

If a terrorist rams it into a building, only you will die.

gfwrite said...

The seating's not assigned. You appear to be a right wing nut. So strut out, grab a strut and your nuts. Your nuts! Almost forgot. We serve nuts.

Anonymous said...

"Oh, and if your United flight is just connecting in Chicago, you might as well buy a fucking house there."

Anonymous said...

"Our Jewish passengers prefer something cheaper than economy class."

Dr Sumguy said...

"I rescued it from a Smithsonian dumpster!"

boneguy said...

I have found this video can really come in handy.

Anonymous said...

"It has more stops than you can shake a joystick at. Speaking of which, how's your joystick?"

Anonymous said...

"Look, asshole, I'm a millenial. If I can help you with anything I'll let you know."

NJ-to-TX said...

"May I suggest that you relieve yourself toward the rear of the plane this time."

Anonymous said...

"As a "Frequent Flyer" you may board early, but please refrain from using the rest room until after take off."

Anonymous said...

"Yeah? Well let me tell you something, mister. JetBlue couldn't carry my jockstrap."

Greenie Stik-M-Caps said...

"Mr. Jefferson, we found your airplane."

Anonymous said...

"Hi, my name is Wilbur and I'm going to be your co-pilot for today."

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry sir, only one carry-on. And yes, unfortunately your colostomy bag does count.

Kathy H said...

"Well, you can store your bags in the overhead, but I can't guarantee that they'll get there when you do."

Dr Sumguy said...

"This is Terminal 'D' ... If you want Al ... He's in Terminal Illness!"

NJ-to-TX said...

"I'm sorry, there are at least 27 unjudged contests ahead of you."

Anonymous said...

"There's no charge for carrying your departed wife on the plane, however, there is a carrion charge of one dollar a pound, and I don't think you can afford that."

gfwrite said...

Sure. We fly bi at Gay Airlines.

gfwrite said...

There is no movie but the "pilot" hums "You Are the Wind Beneath My Wingtips."

Anonymous said...

"We call that one the Seahawk. She got inches from the terminal and quit running."

Jim Cavanaugh

Dex said...

"Luckily, we are already in Chicago."

Anonymous said...

"I am not in "Sales" but you defiantly booked it".

Don Don said...

"It is not about what ydou were sold it is about what you get."

Anonymous said...

Would you like to sign up for our infrequent flyer program?

NJ-to-TX said...

"You indicated that you wanted to get there biplane."

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al in la

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Los Angeles, California, United States
BORN: Brooklyn RAISED: Staten Island WHERE AT NOW: Los Angeles, California WHY: We will one day know.