Sunday, December 15, 2013

New Yorker Anti-Caption Contest #409


54 comments:

Dr Sumguy said...

"I told ya, he was a 'Flight Risk'!"

Puffin said...

"Now you know why we call Al 'The Albatross'."

Levon Delight said...

Maybe it's a message from the Lord, blessed be he, that Hassids should not be throwing people off a pier.

Satireguy said...

Johnson decides to fly with the birds instead.

LR said...

"Whassamatta you? I told you polenta overshoes was a no good!"

LR said...

"Damn good hang time for a white guy."

Dex said...

"Damn stool pigeon"

Anonymous said...

"Carmine...did you use that fucking Quikcrete again?"

Tim H said...

"David Blaine, ladies and gentlemen! David Blaine!"

boneguy said...

Did you not say Houdini, Shmoo-dini?

boneguy said...

Is there anything as satisfying as releasing embezzling accountants back into their natural habitat?

Anonymous said...

"Let him wear himself out, Rocco, then give him a second navel."

Satireguy said...

"Why are we dressed like Hassidim?"

Anonymous said...

The Godfeather IV

Puffin said...

'Ya dumb mugs! This guy was supposed to sleep with the fishes not fly with the fuckin' seagulls!"

pg13 said...

"I knew he was just playing chicken."

pg13 said...

"Dis ain't gonna fly wit da boss."

Kathy H said...

"He's not only a turncoat, he's a terncoat!"

Dr Sumguy said...

"MADONNA!"

boneguy said...

His last wish was to stage a revival of "Angels in America".

Puffin said...

"No sweat boys. He's heading for LaGuardia. We'll whack him after touchdown."

Anonymous said...

"Fucking Olympic swimmers."

gfwrite said...

Who is this guy, Sullenberger?

Anonymous said...

"He thinks he's the fucking Dow Jones..."

Dr Sumguy said...

"Da fucker ate my 'Whirlybird Granola'!"

pg13 said...

"Jesus!"

Satireguy said...

"Al, Al, come back! All is forgiven. There are more contests to be judged!"

Anonymous said...

"Pull!"

Jim Cavanaugh

boneguy said...

Did I not say he could find his way to Poughkeepsie blindfolded?

Puffin said...

"So what are ya waiting for? Break out the Stinger!"

Anonymous said...

"There's water everywhere."

gfwrite said...

Mental note guys. Never try to off a chisler just after he's seen "Gravity."

boneguy said...

This started happening right after Gov. Christie made the stool pigeon the New Jersey State Bird.

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas al to you and your family and adorable granddaughter Nova!

Anonymous said...

"It's a Christmas miracle!"

Jim Cavanaugh

Tim H said...

"I knew this whole thing would cause a big flap!"

cta said...

"He's just gonna take a short flight off a long pier."

cta said...

"If he comes back with an olive branch in his mouth, shoot him."

cta said...

"..and I thought Flying Dutchman was just an old legend!"

cta said...

"The 1920s. The era of mobsters and flappers."

cta said...

"Quick, shoot! And don't just wing him!"

Dr Sumguy said...

"Carmen, wrong shoes ... The styrofoam is for the fish ... 'To sleep with the humans'!"

Anonymous said...

"That's what you get for trying to put a square knot into a round hole."

Anonymous said...

"A jury of his piers set him free."

Froot salad said...

What did you expect from a guy with thirteen arms?

Puffin said...

"Bye Bye Birdie!"

Tim H said...

"For Pete's s- he's fleein' the interview. He's feelin' the interview...!"

Tim H said...

For Pete's s- he's fleein' the interview. He's fleein' the interview...!"

Kathy H said...

"Who knew that his resolution last year was to learn how to fly?"

Anonymous said...

2 H-bombs in a row.

Anonymous said...

"Really, that is all you can say, "Jesus"?"

Anonymous said...

Al (not Capone) makes a desperate bid for freedom from the Anti-Cap (not Capone) hit squad.

Anonymous said...

"I thought you knew how to kite a Czech."

NJ-to-TX said...

"Fuck this, Al."

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al in la

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Los Angeles, California, United States
BORN: Brooklyn RAISED: Staten Island WHERE AT NOW: Los Angeles, California WHY: We will one day know.