"I know I've said this before, P.C., but seriously...what the fuck?"
When I said lose the jawbreakers, I meant just the black ones.
Dude, the official mourning period for Neil Armstrong ended 6 weeks ago.
"Let me guess ... You stopped at 'Jack in the Box'!"
"I'd like to 'Pull your Chain'!"
"Bentley ... What's your opinion on global issues?"
I see Edison has an idea.
Sorry, retirement age is 60, Watt. But I'm sure you have a bright future elsewhere.
You're performance is inefficient. We're replacing you with fluorescent.
"Shut the fuck up, Bieker, or I'll punch your light out."
"Don't give me that blank stare, Pac-Man, or you'll have Pinky across the table to deal with."
I'm very glad you were able to find the light bulb recovered from Richard Gere's ass on EBay, but show and tell isn't till next week.
"I'd like everyone to join me in welcoming our new VP of Public Relations, Jim Gumballmachine."
"And I'd like you 'Spherehead' the next project!"
"And I'd like you to 'Spherehead' the next project!"
"Well that certainly is a sad story, but my associates and I feel you don't have much of a case. This P.C. Vey guy may be a lazy, no-talent hack, but he is not negligent -- not in the legal sense anyway."
"Not only is Simmons as dumb as a lamppost..."
"The board ... Would like to see your 'Teenie Weenie Book Lite'!"
"You've got more ball than brains Jenkins,
"Watson, cum quick!.....that's Emma Watson...........it's a joke....."
Ballhead, you owe Ms. Mophead an apology.
Really, Atebal, that's your answer? "As I see it, yes"
"Apparently when corporate said to have a shine present they meant a nigger."
"Go ahead and excuse yourself, Fred . . . no one wants to be around when that pimple blows."---blw
“Well, I gotta’ admit, a lot of us have balls, but none of ‘em are crystal . . . So what’s the future hold for us, JB?”--left coast wayne
"You don't scare me none, Jason. I've seen all them Friday the 13th movies."
"Christ, what a glass bowl."Jim Cavanaugh
This is Mr. Rick Johnson who is here today to ask us to fund his newest innovation, the personal biosphere.
"You look testy."
"Everyone knows your ball is a clip-on, Simmons."
"OK, everybody, now's the time during the meeting when we listen to and then completely disregard whatever crap Mr. Affirmative Action Hire has to share."
"Our new product line is barber poles, and we want you to be right on top of that."
"Dammit, Berutti! For the last time: absolutely no Super-Elastic-Bubble-Plastic in the Board Room!"
Although I shouldn't have to say this, let's keep the "change the light bulb jokes" to an absolute minimum.
"Oh, I see. When you said that you had experience in light housework you actually meant lighthouse work."
"Everybody, please welcome Jack Snowglobe to the team. Seems he's been having some trouble with no-fly lists, recently."
"You're fired. I bet you didn't see that coming!"
"So, tell me. How did you lose your arms?"
"Ok, lamp post head, we see what you mean. So let's get some feedback from dustpan hair."
"We're sure he's dead? I didn't call the coroner. Did any of you call the coroner?"
"Jesus Christ, Hanson, 'Bring Your Pet to Work' is next week. Now get that damned goldfish out of here!"---left coast wayne
Someone call security and tell them to get the LED out.
Before we get started I'd like to recognize Smither's unprecedented win as the sixteenth floor's bubblegum blowing champ for the third year in the row.
"You're not too bright are you Ned ... I like that in a man!"
"...and another thing: What the hell is a lumen?"
"What's the hub-bub, Bulb?"
"It doesn't look good WATTkins ... The Head Hunter said ... Your not dimmable, you've got globus hystericus, and your plug-in is Viagra dependant!"
QUESTION: How many board members does it take to screw a light bulb? ... ANSWER: None of your fucking business!
"How dare you come in here spouting your nonsense about 'Tim H' being a guest DJ on Sirius XM Satelilte Radio's channel E Street Radio! Why would one want to dial in on Saturday, December 8, at 10 am (ET), anyway? Just to hear the mindless rantings of a lunatic? I mean, just because they're offering free trials for 7 days and 30 days doesn't mean I have any interest, whatsoever, in this Bruce Springsteen garbage! Now, get the hell out of here!!"
"That's right! And take your bad links with you!"
"The plugs here are shameless, but do you still want the job."
"The plugs here are shameless, but do you still want the job?"
"So, I literally have to put a penny through that slot for your thoughts? Can you make change?"
"I was looking for a light bulb above your head not as your head."
"Uh oh. He's got that blank look again."
everybody is staring at me but Little miss toothpick neck over there is really freaky looking!
"Shut up, Bob, everyone knows your bulb is a clap on."
"Stop your balling, Mitt."
"Just remember, Phillips, burnout here at Adler, Pollock & Sheehan results in swift replacement."
"I hear that if we hit a switch, you do some little global warming trick."
"You're an incandescent, Wattson, a relic, a thing of the past. To be honest, you're costing us money.""Yeah, Jonesey, but he gives off a glow the others can't touch and he's free of mercury too. Look at 'im. He's beautiful."
"Well, shall we just adjourn to the bowling alley 'til Al finally gets off his ass and judges this thing?"---blw
"If ou have an idea just raze your hand."
"I hate your face."
“Well, JT, if you’ve got the balls---I mean ‘ball’---go ahead and make a prediction if there’s ever going to be a winner in this mindless and interminable exercise of anti-cap madness.”---the Patients of Job
"One of these days I am going to start carrying gold fish in my pocket."
"You say Richard Gere did this to you?"...................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . (Unfaithful)
"Bulbman! You got the annual report? Or is it the perennial report, ha ha ha!"
"Check his hands - he may be doing that autoerotic asphyxiation thing again."
"I loved Meet the Residents, Third Reich 'n Roll, and most of Eskimo, but you guys really sold out after that."
"I sorry. Did you say something?"
"You know we're all going to be in Older Posts soon and Al can pretend we don't exist."
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