Thursday, September 2, 2010

NY Times Takes Pity on Itty-Bitty-Tittie Committee; For ‘A-Cup Crowd,' Acceptance is the Only Thing Sagging

“I hate getting outbreasted by teenagers.”

--Unidentified woman "laid low by [her] tiny breasts,"

New York Times Anti-Quote of the day.

No less an authority than the NY Times weighted in yesterday on the strides being made by women who have disproportionately minuscule mammary glands, or as the guys in my grade school would say “Milk Duds” You can imagine the tit-for-tat that took place around the copy desk as the writers and editors searched for words to describe female body parts that have countless unprintable names. Adding to the challenge is the story's focus on women who are only well equiped for an accordion recital.

The story, not surprisingly, was penned by a woman (mid-40’s, single, Upper West Side, too many cats, I’m guessing.) The piece dripped with sympathy and chronicled the strides made by women who refuse to ride in the back of the bust bus (so to speak). They survive and some times even mate in a world where the fixation on large breasts gripes heterosexual males from the moment they can grasp. While blogs like this are unburdened by standards and good taste, not so the Old Gray Lady. Below are the terms used in the story to describe breasts that fail to meet the standards for hooters, boobs, ga-zonners or, of course, “the girls.” Use the comment section to add your own.--al in la

small-chested womenSmall-breasted women…small-chested ladieswomen who realized they were never going to fill out…a tiny bosom…minimal assetsSmall-breasted womanmodest-breasted seductiveness…Itty Bitty Bra…Having small breastswomen with modest bustssmall-chested ladies…Lilliputian bust..women who realized they were never going to fill out…a tiny bosom…minimal assets…her A-cupsSmall-breasted women…inconspicuous bosoms. …“bust-challenged,”

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Women with two backs

JC

boozer said...

I'd give her an "A-"

LR said...

Mosquito bites

Hershey kisses

Anonymous said...

No matter what size, if they're present, they're still "the girls".

Anonymous said...

love apples

Anonymous said...

Awesome!! Sunshine Raisins!

Karen said...

carpenter's dream
flat as a board

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al in la

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Los Angeles, California, United States
BORN: Brooklyn RAISED: Staten Island WHERE AT NOW: Los Angeles, California WHY: We will one day know.