Saturday, October 16, 2010

Weekend Bonus: Caption This Photo


NOTE: After a late surge by the Yankees unraveled a 5-0 Texas lead in Game 1 of the ALCS, the camera caught two guys in the stands who looked very, very sad. I recognized the one on the right as Nolan Ryan. a former N.Y. Met who also pitched for a couple of other teams. He is now president of the Texas Rangers. Remarkably, not once did the TV announcers identify the befuddled-looking man next to Ryan who appears to be picking his teeth with his glasses. My guess is that Ryan's companion is so deeply hated humble that even baseball announcers dare not speak his name (Remember the game was on TBS, not Fox.)
That may explain why Ryan himself threw out the ceremonial first pitch prior to the game. No doubt he would have gladly yielded the honor to a beloved Texan who worked tirelessly to bring peace and prosperity to a grateful nation, but evidently there was no one like that around. We can therefore deduce that the enduring legacy of our former POTUS is this: Even Texans could be counted on to boo the shit out of him.
If you can think of a clever, ironic or undignified caption for this photo, please add it to the comments section.
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WINNER
The Texas Rangers
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SECOND PLACE
Red Sox fans
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38 comments:

Anonymous said...

I still got connections, Nolan. You want me to have Jeter waterboarded?

Anonymous said...

The Yankees musta learnt that late surge shit from me.

Jim Cavanaugh

Anonymous said...

The owners here are obscene.

Jim Cavanaugh

Trevor said...

"If you're embarrassed to be seen with me, why did you invite me?"

FDR said...

"Looks like them Yankees are doing to your Rangers what I did to the country. Hee, hee, hee, hee, hee..."

NAMBY said...

"Relax Nolan. Just call the scoreboard guy and have him add a few runs for your guys...That's what I'd do."

NJ-to-TX said...

"The Yankees never stop thinking about new ways to harm our team, and neither do we. Wanna see My Pet Goat?

Satireguy said...

"No, W, we did not misunderestimate the Yankees."

Anonymous said...

"Read my lips. No new Texas."

dwilk

Austin in PA said...

When's kickoff? Hey, hey! Pull my finger!

Austin in PA said...

Nolan Ryan: 7 no-hitters, and still putting up [with] zeroes.

Prescot Hitler said...

"Giving the 'mission accomplished' speech after the seventh inning may not have been a good idea.

Roy White said...

"You should run some attack ads sayin' the Yankees hate America."

Richard H said...

This is not a caption, but I do want al in la to know my book just came out... With all the media hoopla, I only had time to submit two anti-caps this week.

But al, if you feel this is worth a mention to the rest of the anti-cap community, please have at it.

I've already been big on HuffPo, but this could be even more powerful:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/10/08/amazon-crowdsource-ad-campaign_n_754721.html

more at: www.richardhine.com

Anonymous said...

"my armpits stink, I'm having a Pettitte mal, and I'm sitting next to the former most-powerful 'tard on the planet. What happened to me!?"

LV said...

"The Yankees are from New York. The 9/11 and mosque muslims from New York hate America. Therefore, the Yankees hate America. GED- that thar's simple logic, Nolo."

"It's only one game- baby steps, RyRy. I had to learn how to screw up this team before I could go on to fuck up this whole country."
http://wonkette.com/415594/george-w-bush-probably-responsible-for-texas-rangers-bankruptcy-too

JohnnyB said...

GB: I had to oppose gay marriage to win the election, Nolan. It doesn't mean I don't love you.

NR: Georgie, if you can't be honest with the world about your feelings, I can't be with you any more.

Tim H said...

[Ryan, thinking...]

"You'd think owning the ballclub I could keep the riff-raff from sitting next to me..."

Eric G said...

Nolie, you're doing a heckuva job.

Tim H said...

Nolan Ryan having regrets about insisting that his grandson be named "Rube Walker Ryan."

Kathy H said...

"...burp..."

Anonymous said...

"Nolie, will ya let me know when Sammy Sosa gets up to bat?"

Kathy H said...

[Sorry...That brilliance was mine, Kathy H]

"Nolie, will ya let me know when Sammy Sosa gets up to bat?"

Utellme said...

"That's Condoleeza calling. This time SHE'S pitching!"

Ashen Dockworker said...

What have you gotten me mixed up in, Nolan?

Anonymous said...

Kathy H said...

"Y'know, Nolan, those beers ain't gonna drink themselves."

c.c. said...

"Well, it's basically a pirate working as a bank teller. There's some folks on line...Now come on, Nolan, think of something. I wanna win this damn thing."

Anonymous said...

Tim H said...

"Cheney wants to pitch in Game 6."

Kathy H said...

"Hey, Nolie, why don't you demand a recount?"

Anonymous said...

I could have the Supreme Court review the game film.

Jim Cavanaugh

Tim H said...

G.W. Bush: "So, I sez to him, I sez, 'Don't mess with Texas!' And then he sez...."
N. Ryan: "...snore..."

Anonymous said...

Cheer up, Ry. If I can win in 2004 anything's possible.

Jim Cavanaugh

Kathy H said...

Former President George W. Bush seems fooled by the wax figure of Hall of Famer Nolan Ryan which pranksters from Madame Tussauds (Alvin, Texas branch) installed just before game time.

Tim H said...

"So, Nolie, tell me. What position did you play?'

Anonymous said...

"Nolan is a douche. I should have a plane flown into him."

Anonymous said...

Christ al, don't post 'em if you ain't gonna judge 'em.

al in la said...

"Two thinks: I didn't post them, you did. Also I never said it was a contest. (Are you so shallow that you need validation for everything you do?)---al in la

Anonymous said...

Sheesh! You "posted" the picture. I am reasonably shallow, but wasn't looking for validation. Since captioning and judging are mainly what we do here, it seemed to be implied that you might grace us with your comments.

My favorite (not mine btw) was the one about having a plane flown into Nolan. Thought it was a great anti-cap.

I'm going to go sulk now.

Hurting

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