WINNERS
FIRST
PLACE
SECOND
PLACE
"Because....people,
when we all get naked it goes away."--Anonymous (JUDGE'S
COMMENT: And this pays tribute to a recent caption contest cartoon
that had naked office workers gathered at a table. Recognized for the
same reason the above cap got first place.)
THIRD
PLACE
"Your
artwork is..um..well, it's really nice. It's just that I'd like to
move to an office that has windows."--pg13 (JUDGE'S
COMMENT: Sure we get the premise, but that's not nice artwork.)
HONORABLE
MENTIONS
World
War II Japanese stereotypes in the window may be closer than they
appear.--Satireguy
(JUDGE'S
COMMENT: Made me think that in the history of the world the U.S. is
the only nation to ever use a nuclear weapon, and Japan is the only
nation to...well you know. Kind of a unique relationship. )
"So
it's Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce Cutler Gleason Chaough and
Godzilla.
Oh, sorry...
Godzilla Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce Cutler Gleason and
Chaough."--NJ-to-TX
(JUDGE'S
COMMENT: “The Mad Man" reference is appreciated, but I don't think
these people will be dictating the post-takeover terms. Fun fact: There actually is an ad agency in LA named david and goliath [all lower case just to be extra edgy]. I once pitched for their softball team. Nice guys.)
"Looks
like Evrolet Girl is on the rag again."--J.G.G.
(JUDGE'S
COMMENT: Another classic. Guess that explains why she ransacked that chocolate factory and was seen languishing on the shores of Lake Michigan while the other giant girls
where swimming.)
What
a relief! We can all stop wondering what happened to
JohnnyB.--boneguy
(JUDGE'S
COMMENT: I hear tale he's doing 3-to-5 for a B & E he had nothing to do with. Be strong Johnny.)
"I
distinctly remember instructing my secretary to inform me whenever my
mother-in-law dropped by."--Kathy
H (JUDGE'S
COMMENT: Granted mother-in-law jokes are perennial comic fodder, but I have two who have been very wonderful to me. Maybe Kathy's linking obsession has stirred the ire of her mom-in-law. And if the guy in the cartoon knew she was going to pop over, would that
have softened the contempt he feels for her, much less stop her?)
"Al
dente in la."--pg13
(JUDGE'S COMMENT: Household Tip: You
can tell your spaghetti is done the same way you can tell an item of clothing needs to be washed: Throw it against the wall and see if it sticks. You can say the same about Anti-Caps—metaphorically, I
mean.)
57 comments:
I feel a kinship to that creature, Ethel. We will have both eaten you today.
...and I continue to remain optimistic that we will emerge equally united as a fully formed stool.
"Is it the 'Macy's Day Parade' already?")
"So it's Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce Cutler Gleason Chaough and Godzilla.
Oh, sorry... Godzilla Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce Cutler Gleason and Chaough."
"Relax, it's my daughter's senior thesis at Cooper Union."
"The theme of today's team-building session is 'Be a Chum'."
Anyone else here having second thoughts about being the first "big five" accounting firm to colonize Mars?
What a relief! We can all stop wondering what happened to JohnnyB.
"Is it Take Your Ogre to Work Day already?"
Worst.Triptych.Ever!
"I sense a hostile takeover ... Time to invoke the 'Golden Showers' clause!"
"What's next? People being marched to their flaming deaths in the street by the devil's henchmen?"
"Looks like Evrolet Girl is on the rag again."
"He just found out that Maurice Sendak is dead."
"Will you people please stop doing the Harlem Shake!?"
"The ogres here are extreme."
[Nod to...oh...me!
"Because....people, when we all get naked it goes away."
"It looks like the Japanese economy is recovering."
World War II Japanese stereotypes in the window may be closer than they appear.
"He's a weird monkey, very funky."
Jim Cavanaugh
"No donuts?"
Did anyone here forget to pay the X-men Window Washing Company?
"Did you know that only 10% of Americans floss on a daily basis!"
"Remind me again why we're having him back for a follow-up interview."
Let me first start by pointing out 'The Sea Monkey' brand was long overdue for a makeover.
"Who sharted?"
"Any new business?"
"...and advise the staff not to exit via Park Avenue for the time being."
"The Board ... Ah ... Orgeroom will now come to order!"
"Help me out, people. I can't think of anything funny to say, and I don't want to end up in first place again."
"All those in favor of moving 'Bargin Basement Sales' to a higher floor, raise your hand!"
"So, it's settled. We shall call it Ogre Winfrey."
"Ethyl ... Did you forget to feed our 'Takamoto Shih Tzu'
"How much is that doggie in the window?"
"Worst. Glory Holes. Ever"
"Linda, I think your crabs are getting worse."
"The good news is that it's just an ordinary lizard. Unfortunately we are only two inches tall."
"Your artwork is..um..well, it's really nice. It's just that I'd like to move to an office that has windows."
"Al dente in la."
"King Kong said it was a terrible blow job."
"I think my evacuation will last for more than four hours."
Buying an actual monster behind those windows is cheaper than three panels with that painted on them.
"FYI ... Godzilla ToyWiz.com ... Has moved in next door!"
Anyone else here feel like having sex?
"I distinctly remember instructing my secretary to inform me whenever my mother-in-law dropped by."
"Brace yourselve's ... We are about to be hit by a 'Fisker Karma' electric vehicle!"
"HR sent me a report from the surveys you filled out recently. Our last speaker wasn't motivational enough for some of you."
"What did you think Dick Cheney would look like after 200 years?"
All in favor of running like hell, say 'aye'. All opposed, prepare your organs for involuntary donation.
"According to this document, we have just been acquired by ... 'Shit Eating Grin Inc.'!"
"A quorum of the board being present, I move that we approve the minutes of the last meeting of Monsters, Inc."
...moving along to the hostile takeover bid by Tiki Bar Inc.
"There's too much pissing and shitting going on ... I'm sensing an imminent visit by HERA, the goddess of raging fury and madness!"
Just spitballin' here but we are thinking of this being the face of the NSA's domestic surveillance program.
Another slow day at The Cleveland Institute For Method Acting & Extreme Voyeurism.
"Sure is big."
"It is big."
"What's it... doing?"
"Saving us money."
"Hello! It's just hangin' out."
"It's malpractice insurance. It's supposed to be there when you need it."
"What ever happened to the London Whale?"
Post a Comment